Better Than Me
by gravihag
Summary: A fight results in Goten leaving and Trunks reflects on what went wrong. GxT Yaoi. Songfic. Better than me by Hinder.


_'I can't do this anymore! I never get to see you. I'm asleep before you get home and you're gone before I get up! The most I get to see of you is your laundry and a phone call!'_

_'Goten, I do not want to argue with you right now-'_

_'Well I do! At least it will be in person!'_

_'Would you shut __up!__ God! You are so whiny. Just shut up!'_

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I think you can do much better than meAfter all the lies that I made you believeGuilt kicks in and I start to seeThe edge of the bedWhere your nightgown used to beI told myself I won't miss youBut I rememberWhat it feels like beside you

Trunks shook his head, trying to shake the memory from his mind. It played like a broken record, stabbing at his heart over and over again. It was his fault and he had realized it too late. Three months had passed since that night. Since Goten had left and he hadn't went after him. He brooded for days blaming it all on Goten. How he didn't understand, he owned the company, he had to be there.

But slowly it began to sink in. Nobody was sleeping in his bed when he got home. And no matter how hard he tried to fall asleep he couldn't. He tried to work more, but Bulma sent him home. She'd been telling him how stressed he had been. He wished he had taken the time to listen.

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I really miss your hair in my faceAnd the way your innocence tastesAnd I think you should know thisYou deserve much better than me

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Loneliness took over him and he kept asking himself 'how could he have lived like that? It must have made him miserable.' When he called to try and apologize Goten quietly told him he was going to move his things out.

Trunks didn't argue with him. He had lost that right. Three months later they still hadn't spoken. Goten would call and leave a message on the machine letting Trunks know when he would be by. Each time Trunks would leave. He didn't think he could be around him. They thought everything was gone but Trunks had found a box marked 'Goten's eyes only' under their-the bed. Trunks called and left a message. Setting the box on the table he took a walk. Stuck in the hell of his thoughts.

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While looking through your old box of notesI found those pictures I tookThat you were looking for

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He noticed he was soaking wet and wondered how long it had been raining. He looked to his watch, finding it had been over two hours since he left the house. 'He's gone by now.' He thought turning back.

Eight years they had been together, and Trunks knew it was his fault Goten was gone. With each thought and each memory, he reminded himself of it. And for what? Nothing. A momentary obsession with his job. They didn't need him there anyway. He didn't need to work at all.

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I really miss your hair in my faceAnd the way your innocence tastesAnd I think you should know thisYou deserve much better than me

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He climbed the stairs to the porch coming to a dead halt at the top. Goten was leaning against the door, knees pulled tightly against his chest holding something in his hand. Trunks could barely breathe, wondering if he was imagining this. The box that had been on the table lay open near Goten. It was full of pictures, all of them. A few on top he could see from when they were younger and a picture from Goten's graduation. Goten extended his hand up to Trunks showing him the picture in his hand. Trunks stepped forward forcing himself not to shake and took it.

The edges were warn, like it had been held a lot, or kept in a pocket. He remembered the photo, and the moment it held. A month after they had started dating they went on their first real date. After the movie they went for a walk to the pier. Sitting at the end hanging their legs off the side Goten whipped out a camera. 'Let's take a picture' and right before he clicked the button Trunks had turned and kissed his cheek. The surprise was evident in Goten's eyes.

Streaked down the photo were several tear marks. Trunks looked down at Goten, whose shoulders were shaking. He could see his hands shaking harder than his shoulders. Tear drops rolling down them. He grabbed a hold of Goten's forearm lightly and pulled him to his feet. Goten's head hung down towards the porch, small sobs wracking his body.

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The bed I'm lying in is getting colderWish I never would've said it's overAnd I can't pretend...

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Trunks could feel his heart breaking all over again. He didn't know it was possible. He brought his hand up gingerly wiping some tears away softly cupping Goten's cheek. And when Goten looked up at him, through bloodshot eyes, all he could see was pain.

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... I won't think about you when I'm olderCause we never really had our closureThis can't be the end

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"…Ten…" He said quietly "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I didn't listen to you…I'm sorry." He felt his voice hitch in his throat and turned his face away, unable to look into those broken brown eyes any longer.

His hand was pushed away from Goten's face and Goten's arms wrapped tightly around his neck.

"I can't live like this!"His voice was whispered into Trunks shoulder. He could hear the pain and desperation in his voice. "It hurts so much. I-I'm sorry we fought, I'm sorry I left-"

Trunks pulled away to hold Goten's face between his hands. "No, it's all my fault. I should have noticed what an ass I was being. I should have gone after you; I shouldn't have let you go in the first place."

"I don't care!" Goten sobbed. "I just want this pain to stop, make it stop!"

Their lips crushed together in a painful bitter sweet kiss. Trunks could taste the salt from Goten's tears. Trunks grabbed hold of Goten's back pockets lifting Goten up and Goten wrapped his legs around Trunks waist. They held as long as they could and after what seemed like an eternity they broke for much needed air. Goten laid his head in the crook of Trunks neck and began to cry again clenching his hands into the back of Trunks soaked shirt.

"I love you, I missed you, I'm so sorry. Please stay with me. Please don't leave me again, please." Trunks pleaded, pulling Goten tightly into his embrace.

Goten shook his head almost violently into Trunks shoulder. "No, never. I never should have." His body was shivering from Trunks wet body against his. Trunks opened the door and they slipped inside. He stood in the hall way for sometime just holding onto Goten as tightly as he could. "You deserve much better than me." He whispered, but in the quiet house it echoed off the walls.

Goten pulled back and looked into Trunks eyes. "There is no one better." He said softly, bringing his hand up to wipe some hair from Trunks brow. "Don't you know that by now?"

Trunks leaned in a bit, hesitating for a moment. Goten closed the gap removing his fear, gently kissing him.

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I really miss your hair in my faceAnd the way your innocence tastesAnd I think you should know thisYou deserve much better than me

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Goten cried the rest of the night, as each piece of clothing found the floor, as each 'I love you' and 'I'm sorry' was said, as they lay in bed until the early hours of the morning. Trunks kissed his tears away, held him close.

"What time is it?" Goten whispered.

"4:26."

Goten rolled over towards Trunks. "Now what?"

Trunks gently pushed some hair out of Gotens eyes. "We're going to sleep in today. And when we get up I'm going to make you lunch. Or dinner depending on the time. Tomorrow we are going to move your things back in, and if you let me I'll spend the rest of our lives trying to become the man you deserve."

Goten looked up at him mouth agape, finally breaking the silence with "That was corny." Which they both laughed at. Halfway through the laugh Goten started to cry again. "I'll let you." He smiled through tears. "I'll let you."


End file.
